Ultra Flesh (1980)
Men of earth are suffering from limp dick because of an evil alien Jamie Gillis screwing the world over. Even the president is suffering. Seka (the hottest blonde pornstar ever) plays "Ultra Flesh", a woman from space sent to earth to give men back their erections. She has to bang a lot of guys to get their penises strong again and has LASER BEAMS shoot out her vagina. That's right, VAGINA LASER BEAMS! When she has trouble fucking all the limp dick men, she manages to get help from more women from space, her "Fleshettes". A whole lot of babes start showing up, who also can shoot lasers from their vaginas. The most hilarious thing is the sleazoid dwarf that rapes one chick and does other comical stuff such as running around like an idiot in a chase scene. He was played by Luis De Jesus aka Ralphus from the cult gore film "Bloodsucking Freaks". He was also an Ewok in "Return of the Jedi". This is a cool porno/comedy film combined with awesome 80's b-movie cheeze. The kinda cheeze with goofy aliens, ridiculously dumb storylines, and a dork president that shows the world his penis. My one complaint about the film is I wish Seka had more scenes, I love watching a young Seka fuck ANYTHING. It would have been perfect if she got in a gangbang with the retarded looking aliens. Only alien she banged was Jamie Gillis in the end cause he was trying to kill her or something. Gillis didn't have a goofy alien costume but he did have a corny accent. Anyways, fun movie, an extremely campy cult classic.
Crude Dude's Verdict: Sexy and funny, the aliens and story will make you laugh and Seka will just make you hard. I got an erection just thinking about this movie.
~ joseangeles AT muchomail.com